sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
