we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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