SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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