Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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