I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize
