I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Randomize
