She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday