There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
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Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
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I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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