Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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