Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize