I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
