Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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