I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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