all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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