People in love make me want to vomit
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize