so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
