I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
