trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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