Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
