I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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