champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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