Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Still dying that you shit outside
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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