check it out our google latitudes are spooning
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Drunk is not a location!
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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