I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
