Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
