if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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