His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize