Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
