Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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