no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
is that a dick in a sweater?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
