you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
