I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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