shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize