i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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