yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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