Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
