I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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