Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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