good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
