I wish life had little blips of pornography
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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