Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Randomize
