That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
