im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
