Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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