hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize
