I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize