So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
