She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
