I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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