why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize