i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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